Convergence and Divergence of Communication

Nico Brown COJO 1030 October 25, 2012 crossway and Divergence analyse Intentionally or intuitively, we constantly use convergence and division in our daily communication r surfaceine. While the process itself is automatic the manner of non doing either does not exist, because one of the both is alship canal organism chosen. Convergence is the process of adapting ones speech style to match opposites they want to identify and divergence is the use of linguistic mannerisms that emphasizes a persons differences from others.A person would be able to under fend for these two apprehensions through personal examples by equivalence and contrasting the differences in each term, discussing what aspects of these communicative techniques were informed and which were un sensible, and explaining the relational consequences. When view of the meaning of convergence, it takes me back to when I was in fourth grade. I had been dismissal to this school for three years I knew foreveryone and everyone knew me. All of my friends would come to my ingleside after school and we would hangout until the sun went down. Everything we did, we did it together.Whether it was getting into trouble by stealing the neighbors cat or celebrating each others birthday there wasnt an hour when you could see us apart from each other. Then one day we moved out of the neighborhood, which in addition meant I moved schools, but worst of all, my friends. Being that it was the shopping mall of the second semester, I didnt automatically fit in with the kids at my new school. The fact that I was now three towns from where I grew up and what my former friends and I did for fun was now considered lame led me to bring less chances of acquiring new friends.After a calendar week or two of eating, playing and session alone I figured to give it a shot that whatever they are doing, and even though it might be opposite than what I do, it may be fun. The next Monday during the morning dispel I walked up to a group of kids and aimed to play with them. A week later I had three new friends and with that I picked up a a few(prenominal) new words. This is an example of convergence. The fact that I changed the way I did things while being reliable by others. An example of divergence would be the time I moved from the state of Kansas to the Lone Star call forth of Texas.Being in a new state was a lot distinct than being in a new town that is a few miles down the road. Every Texan I came in contact with would ask me the same questions and say all the same things. Have I ever been in a tornado, does it rain a lot in Kansas, does Kansas take a leak a lot of tornadoes, I talk weird, I sound funny, I have an stress. Personally that was the first time someone told me I had an accent or talked funny, and I got them both in the same day. I recall when I asked a guy what his favorite pop was. He looked at me with a conf utilize face and asked what it was. Example of illustrators, a Non-v erbal behavior that accompanies and supports verbal message). When I told him some people call it soda he laughed at me and said he thought I was talking about champagne. When I joined the football team the coaches would tell me to do certain things and when I never did they would argue that I was doing everything wrong. Then when they saw me do something good, they asked where I learned it from and my answer was would always be Kansas. Everything I did I make sure that everyone knew that I was from Kansas.Whether it was the way I walked, the way I talked, the things I said, or the things I did. Thinking back, motivations I used when I was in the fourth grade would have come from all those days of sitting alone as well as eating alone. The thought of not being able to be around my old friends pushed me to get more friends. As to when I moved to Texas the reason I wanted to stand out from being the same as everyone else was because Kansas was all I knew. Everything I had ever known at that point I learned in Kansas and the sudden change just made me want make a statement that I was not a Texas native.I would say that the wanting to standout from everyone in Texas was unconscious. The reason being because everyone did certain things that I would have never do if I were back home in Kansas and what I did they considered it to be different and something was wrong with it. But as much as they pointed out what I did differently I couldnt table service it because hose were things I was used to. It was more of a reflex because I was so used to doing and truism things in a certain way. Trying to change it would be conscious because I would focus more to what I was saying and how I would remove to make it different.When I changed schools and finally decided to make new friends was conscious communication techniques. Because I had to think about it before it happened. I also changed the way I behaved and I would say things in different ways than how I would usually say them. Instead of all of this automatically adventure I had to think about things that I said and remember what was what so I would be accepted within the group. These two innocent situations that I experienced had unaware consequences on the involved relationships. The first one being that I changed the way I did things and I got new friends.The second being I was able to be myself and I was considered different. And even though I was not the same as everyone else, I still managed to have friends that accepted me for who I was. Convergence and divergence both impacts and have an effect on our lives and the truth they always will. While we will use convergence to help us get closer to people and divergence to keep us distant from the ones we dont want to be around. They two impairment will continually be used throughout our lives determining the types of relationships we have. Whether its intentional or not, we will always use one concept or the other.